Five simple fucking ingredients in this bitch right here. This is some good shit to make when you are feeling bougie as fuck. High-fructose corn syrup? Naw son, I don’t play that. Hit this with some vodka though, different story. Max relax.
LAVENDER LEMONADE
5 cups of water
1/2 -3/4 cup sugar (yeah, it is fucking lemonade. without the sugar it is just real sour fucking water)
3/4 cup Meyer lemon juice, about 6 lemons (you can just use the regular lemons at the store too, not a dealbreaker)
juice of half a lime
4 sprigs of fresh lavender
Bring the water to a boil in a medium pot. Add the sugar and simmer that shit on a low heat for about 5 minutes. Make sure to stir it on the regular. The sugar should be all dissolved in the water by now with no little fucking grains rolling around in there. Turn off the heat and stir in the lemon juice, lime juice, and lavender. Let it cool until it is around room temperature. Take the lavender pieces out but use a fucking spoon and not your fingers if you are going to serve that shit to other people. Put the lemonade in the fridge to cool down all the way. Serve with lemon wedges and a pinch of dried lavender if you want it to look fucking impressive.
makes about 1 quart of chill the fuck out
You don’t need a party to get down on some guacamole. Put it on a salad, taco, tostada, sandwich, whatever you want. Eat it with your hands. I don’t give a flying fuck. SNACK LIFE.
GRAPEFRUIT GUACAMOLE
5 ripe avocados
2 medium grapefruits or 1 big son of a bitch
¼ cup chopped cilantro
¼ cup chopped red onion
juice of 1 lime (about 2 tablespoons)
¼ teaspoon salt
Take the pit out of the avocados and scoop out all the green flesh into a large bowl. Mash it up with fork. I like my guacamole chunky but do what you gotta do. Cut the grapefruit up into segments like you would cut an orange. Remove the peel and cut the segments into pieces about the size of a nickel. Put all the grapefruit into the bowl with the avocado. Add the cilantro, red onion, lime juice, and salt and mix it all up. Taste it and add more shit until you like it. Serve immediately or chill it for a bit. I’m not gonna tell you how to eat guacamole, just follow your fucking heart.
Two years ago, we launched an experiment: an online image library where we made 2,000 high-resolution images of artworks that the museum deemed to be in the public domain available for download without any restrictions. This week, we’ve exceeded ourselves with the launch of our new collections website, giving away ten times the number of images we offered in the initial image library. Nearly 20,000 high-quality images of art from our collection are available to search, download, and use as you see fit.
What Do Cats Have to Do With It? Welcome to Our New Collections Website
Dear Tumblr-verse,
Merry Christmas: we just gave you 20,000 high-resolution images, for free. Now we have just one question: what are you going to do with them?
FIRST, CASUALLY PREPARE A RITUAL FOR THE THE BREAD GODS UNTIL THEY GIFT YOU YOU SOME SPIRIT-BLESSED SOURDOUGH.
HUMBLY BEG THE FAMILY COW FOR SOME MILK OR IF SHE’S THE NON-SPEAKING TYPE, GENTLY PUNCH EVERY INCH OF THE UDDER UNTIL YOU HAVE ENOUGH TO MAKE SOME PROVOLONE CHEESE AND BUTTER. PET HER…
Smoky Sweet Potato Burgers with Roasted Garlic Cream & Avocado by How Sweet It Is
ARE YOU HUNGRY AS A MOTHERFUCKING BEAR AFTER AWAKENING FROM YOUR WINTER SLUMBER? WELL THEN GO COOK YOURSELF SOME MOTHERFUCKING CURRIED CHICKPEAS TO SLAKE YOUR HUNGER BEFORE YOU GO TAKE DOWN A DEER IN THE WOODS, GODDAMN.
FIRST OBTAIN A LUTE AND LOVINGLY SERENADE A BOVINE MAIDEN UNTILL SHE IS…
